Apr 7, 2006

My Dad

Armand Jordan 1938-2006

We lost him today. For months he fought the odds. His life force wouldn’t let either himself or us give up. Conversations were held when there was no windpipe. The man in the hospital bed delivering words of encouragement to the people for whom he made life complete. Does it seem impossible?
Not for Armand Jordan.
I fell in love with his son. Armand folded me into the family. Unconditional love from the second meeting and trust from the first. Sure it took Monty Python and Billy Connelly’s fart jokes, not to mention a shit load of Mexican food but Armand had two perspectives, good and not good.
Monday morning grunts of approval from Jon’s Dad came to mean as much to me as weekends with the son. Strange? probably. Unusual? Certainly. But no one who knew him will be surprised by the declaration.
This is a man who upon seeing his first child buy a house was too happy for words. He was a man who once told me his second daughter could paint anything, and when she decided what she wanted to paint no one could touch her. Of Jon he often said, “he’ll make it happen.” and of the first daughter, he said “she can write words that reach other people.”
He’s so proud of them all. Paul and Jon and Jen4 and Dianne. His eyes twinkle as he discusses them. They’ve come to realize dreams and they’re not half done yet. the world is full of possibilities and he’s raised this group to reach for the stars.
For Karen he has only the deepest love. “Marriage isn’t easy,” he says on those Monday mornings. “But it is the best thing in life if you love the person you’re married to.”
“You love Jon? Don’t you?” And for a second I see papa bear. Promise to myself I’ll never let the father down. I love the son. I’m happy I got to love the father. Tonight I love Jordan. Period. Memories, future, and now. We are who we are in no small part due to this man. He has taught us all to reach for what we will become and we will be more for what he gave us. He is here. Always. I love him and so he continues to be.

Is it memory if you see the eyes twinkling or the grin that means trouble? Those are here now. Armand will be here always.
Ruth Jordan


There are many things I take for granted. Every time I pick up a wrench or a screwdriver I have every confidence that what ever I take apart will go back together and be better than when I started. Ever time I pick up a wrench or a screwdriver it’s my Father’s hand that is guiding it. He started teaching me early. Not just mechanics, but about life and people and the world around me. Not a day goes by that I don’t have his influence driving something I do. He told me never start a fight and never loose one. So far so good. He taught me that if I wanted to do something all I had to do it. Trust God he said.

He was there to teach me lot of things. He was also smart enough to know when to let me learn some of life’s lessons the hard way. And if I stumbled or fell he was there to pick me up and dust me off. No judgment, just acceptance.

He worked eighty hour weeks when I was younger, coming home and falling asleep before dinner. Yet he still had time for us. Every Sunday the family went somewhere and he made the day special. He would later tell me he wished he had spent more time with us. He spent as much time with us as he could, and the truth is there would never have been enough.

In the past 6 months I had a bit too much time to think about things said and unsaid. Too many what ifs and whys. And now what’s said is said and what’s done is done. I know my father was proud of me and my brother and sisters. I just hope he knew how proud I was of him and how much respect I had for him. He did some pretty amazing things in his life time. Not change the world amazing or cure cancer amazing, but amazing none the less. He touched a lot of lives and made a difference to a lot of people.

I know he was happy for who we had become. I hope he knows that who we are is because of him.
Who am I?
Armand Jordan’s son Jon

19 comments:

Marcus Sakey said...

I'm so very sorry, Jon. My heart goes out to your whole family. Know that a lot of people are wishing you well right now.

Bleak House Books said...

Jon and Ruth--from our family to yours, you have our deepest sympathy. If there's anything we can do, let us know.

Ben and Alison

Cornelia Read said...

He must have been a very, very fine man. Thank you so much for sharing these thoughts about him with all of us, Jon and Ruth, and please know that you are in our fondest thoughts at this very sad time (and always).

Annie C said...

The right words of condolence are so hard to find at this moment, all seem inadequate ... But I'm thinking back this morning to the several occasions when I met your Dad. And how he never left any doubt in my mind as to how extremely proud he was of each one of you. He told me so, every time. With our deepest sympathy to your family.
Love,
Annie & David

anne frasier said...

so sorry to hear your sad news. :(

Sandra Ruttan said...

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Anything one says seems trite in the face of such grief, but trust that in the way that Armand Jordan influenced your life, through you he has touched us all.

Steve Mandel said...

Jon,

Simple words might seem of little comfort during a time like this. Yet I'd still like to offer my deepest sympathies to you and your family.

Steven said...

Very sorry for your loss. I will keep your family in my prayers.

Patricia & Soren said...

Jon and Ruth, our hearts and thoughts are with you and your families..time will ease the sorrow but not the joy and love that this dad, husband,father and friend shared with his family. Hugs to you both

Anonymous said...

JON, JEN, RUTH
I KNEW YOUR DAD THROUGH YE AND THAT IS SURE WONDROUS TESTAMENT TO HIM.......I KNOW HE IS SAYING...........THIS IS MY BELOVED FAMILY IN WHOM I'M WELL PROUD.....HE GAVE US YOU GUYS........AND NO FINER GIFT HAS EVER BEEN LAID ON ME TABLE THAN THE JORDANS......
FOR THAT I THANK HIM AND MOURN HIM TOO
MAY HE REST IN CONTENTED PEACE KNOWING HOW MUCH US LOT LOVE HIS FAMILY
KEN BRUEN

ToddM326 said...

I am very sorry for your loss.

jenni411 said...

{{{Jordan family}}}

I'm so sorry. He sounds like a wonderful man.


Jenni

C.W. Cale said...

I felt very good reading your post. I'm happy such a guy lived here and raised good people. Thank you for sharing this news with us.

Be strong and all that. No, words don't help much. Just keep those good memories and focus on the spirit.

Wish I coulda met him.

Rae said...

Jon and Ruth,

What a wonderful man he must have been. I'm so sorry that you've had to say good-bye to him, and I'm sending lots of good thoughts your way.

Take care of yourselves.......

Sarah said...

El maleh rachamim, kedushat hayom.

Find comfort and strength in each other and that no matter what, your father's always going to be proud of you all.

Tania said...

Your whole family has my sincerest condolences.

Having lost both my parents, I know the hole that a parent's death can leave in one's life and heart. Take comfort in one another and in the fact that you were a source of joy and pride for a wonderful person.

Relish the memories, and take care of yourselves.

Mary said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. I know you must be going through a rough time now. You, Ruth, and Jen are in my thoughts.

Daniel Hatadi said...

So sorry to hear about your loss.

Gerald So said...

Just saw the news on CrimeSpot. My condolences to you and yours.