Social and anti social networking

Everywhere I look I see articles about social networking. A local business paper did an article about it and its all over the internet. A lot of these pieces talk about the marketing aspect of Twitter and Facebook, and yes, even myspace (Still?). What all these sources of information forget is a word that is found in the description.

SOCIAL

This is not a place people go to see ads or get feeds filled with nothing but self promotion.

These places need to be treated like a cocktail party. If you get cornered by some guy in a bad suit at a party and all he can talk about is how you need to improve your insurance and buy it from him chances are you will take the very first opportunity to flee this person. The same is true on the internet. I don't follow people on Twitter because I want updates on their latest book reviews or to be reminded once again that their book is STILL on sale. I don't friend people on facebook so I can be hit over the head with products placement. And I really don't like all the "Be my fan" requests. If I've had dinner with you I consider us to be friendly, if not friends. I'm not your fan, I'm your friend. And even if I am a fan of what you do, we're friends first.

Some self promotion on these sites is fine, and you'd actually be silly not to do some. But again, it's like a cocktail party. When I talk to people at social functions it comes up that I publish Crimespree. But it's not the only thing I talk about. The same thig onthese sites. Every now and then Crimespree stuff goes up, and I think it is effective, to a point.

I love these sites. I've connected with people I haven't seen in years, and I keep in touch with people I wish I could talk to more but just don't have the time to. I love hearing about what movie my buddy RD Hall is watching. I think abot hm and smile. I love know what my cousin Julie thinks abot the football game. Gregg Hurwtiz's headlines of the day posts always give me a kick. I found out that a person I went to high scool with and always had a locker next to mine is now a Dean of a university! Way to go Wayne. My friend from college Jeff is doing awesome in Hollywood. Even just using Blip.FM to share music is a great way of connecting. I can tell what kind of day people are having just by the music they are listening to.

The one thing I've noticed is that I love getting these updates on people I know amd knowing that almost every one of them seems happy. It's not important to hook up at the same time, I can leave messages at 4:00 am and get a response later. Much easier than trying to coordiinate schedules in the real world.

It's also kind of fun to see the different groups ofpeople Iknow all on one big page being fed to me. People from comic conventions, mystery authors and fans we've met at conventions, high school friends, people from college and even the lost years when I was bartending. Everybody all in one place. It's like an ala cart party with just the poepl you want there and none of the folks who made you crazy.

So yes, I'll be your friend on facebook and follow you on twitter, but please, don't treat me like a customer.